Intention and Sex

Hi and welcome to today’s Vlog – in this Vlog I am talking about the necessity of setting intentions before the act of sex and various other places in Your life.

Below is a rough Transcription of the Video for You to read.

Please note I have used the “EFF” word about 2 or 3 times in the video – it was used to illustrate a point. Please forgive this if You are sensitive to language. I am very sensitive towards my viewers and language. In this case as pointed out, it was a necessary word to use.

Kindly note that my content is age – restricted.

Transcription :

The intention of Sex

Usually couples will have sex, because it releases stress when You reach an orgasm. Many times we will focus so deeply on reaching the orgasm that we will do whatever it takes to reach it. And if you don’t reach the orgasm space, it can leave you unsatisfied and well down in the dumps. And this can make space for the big nasty doubt that follows. Which in effect has a ripple effect in the rest of your life.

You see, sex is actually deeply and I mean deeply woven into your life on all levels.

I read on the internet some time ago a statement I deeply agree with. The usual way we approach sex is well – like masturbating using your partners body. There is no reverie. No connection and no true and deep intimacy. It’s a fuck. And that’s it. Nothing more. And believe me sex can be sooo much more.

Orgasms and sex is actually a hugely spiritual experience. It is deeply freeing when You are truly rooted deeply into Your body on all levels. When You can be present and have this consciousness about what you’re doing every moment, it is like a wave… it builds. But You, you are so present to the sensations and experiences that You get lost in the beauty and splendour and the amazing deep fulfilment that sex can offer on an emotional level over a physical level.

This is why there is something called Sacred Sexuality. Because sex is actually deeply sacred. It is a sacred act for two to become one. It is a sacred act to tap into Your partner and to revere and honour them in the most beautiful and sacred of ways.

When You are able to do this. You open the doors for a happier more fulfilling relationship. Because the old things that used to be so bothersome and painful becomes something of the past. Because You’re in the NOW. Not in the past or the future.

And this is what this Vlog is about today – what if you can take one little step and change that and it could result in bigger improvements over time?

One of the ways to do this is intention.

And this is hugely underrated with couples and well just most people. You’re more focused on satisfying the itch than creating that link of intimacy. And this is the mistake so many make.

Intention like being present in the moment is such  beautiful tools You can use to empower your life. And you don’t have to just use this during sex. Learning how to set an intention before You communicate with any person can make space for better communication and better experiences.

Setting an intention for Your day can totally shift Your day into something so beautifully powerful over just letting Your day happen to You.

Setting an intention for your meeting, or for whatever You may be writing is another way to empower Your life. As you can see, having an intention in each moment is deeply powerful. It is the difference between misunderstandings and deep communication.

Now, let’s look at the word intention and it’s meaning, it simply means that you are finding a deep truth within Yourself, and then doing whatever You can to align Your actions with that truth.

Setting an intention also activates Your Reticular activation system, this is a nerve bundle that allows You to focus on what is desired and something that is incredibly powerful in everyday life for various reasons. I teach my Abundance ladies how to use these nerves to empower themselves on a great level.

So when You are setting Your intentions before You engage or do anything, you are actually going into this state where You know that You are part of a whole. Something so beautiful and powerful and so much bigger than You and that You are trusting this process. There is something so much bigger than ourselves inside of all of us. And when You go into intention you are activating that intimacy with this part of You that has so much power.

Now when it comes to sex, setting your intentions to instead reach the orgasm state, but to rather reach a deeper connection with your partner actually allows for really beautiful changes to be experienced on a dramatic level. I also want to invite you to be flexible in this space. Because last thing you want is to become hard up for the intention and not having the ability to be flexible and to flow into what might present itself, while coming from a state of love and compassion.

I want to remind You, that this is not just for people that are in a relationship, if You’re masturbating (Which is sex), then set an intention as well.

Intention comes from a space of love, compassion and deep wisdom and intuition. Intention comes from the wisest parts of ourselves. The pieces of ourselves that want better and that want to create a world that is loving and compassionate. Intention is in it’s rawest form truly powerful, because it taps into the most “holiest” parts of ourselves to put it that way. It is part and parcel of our highest state.

So with that, I want to invite you to enter this from a state of love, compassion and being open to growing and learning.

So, let’s go a bit into what it would look like when You set your intentions.

Now, let’s say You are in a partnership, I want to invite you to see your partner as Divine. Because we all stem from Divinity, and in Tantra and Neo Tantra we believe that all we encounter is divine, therefore we should treat each other in that way. We should treat each other how we would treat the Creator if we ever came face to face with Him/Her/Them – whatever You might believe.

Would you be disrespectful to God, or to Kali or to Ganesh if they stood in front of you right now? I doubt it. And do you know that imbued in each of You, is a part of the Divine spark? So that makes You divine. That makes us all divine. Yes we forget it, but it’s good to be reminded of that.

So if you were in your most divine state now, how would you still in your human body but intimately connected with sex as being sacred experience it? Knowing that through Your sexual act that worlds and stars are born.

Would you just want to excuse my language have a fuck? Or would it be something of divine intent?

I bet that it would be of divine intent right?

The intention of opening your heart so much that Your partner can know that they are being revered and worshiped. And that You’re not there to just rub your genitals on each other but to rather create a connection so deeply powerful that the message of compassion, love and reverie is being carried over through the way You look at each other, or how you caress each other’s skin.

Or the intention of sending a message on another level to your partner that they are so special to You and that You want to drink from them and learn and connect beyond words and beyond sex.

You might want to bring the message across to your partner that You want them to feel totally worshipped on all levels when You’re together. And that is done without words. That is done through intention. Sometimes Your partner might not be connected and that’s okay – be patient with them. This is about YOU bringing across the message. Eventually they will pick it up. But they will.

Or if  You’re alone currently and you’re practicing self pleasure practices, you want to have the intention that today during this experience you want to connect deeper with Your body’s wisdom and to just worship Your own beingness. You want to create a better relationship with Your body and perhaps feel happier in it, while becoming more present in it.

Setting an intention is not a quick decision, this is a slower experience. It is like praying at the altar or in the temple. You might want to set the intention to transmute Your sexual energies, or to feel multiple orgasms and so on.

Practical advice here on setting intention…

It starts with taking a moment of silence, and allowing yourself to gently become aware of your body and your essence. Be in the now, even if it’s a few seconds. If your mind drifts off to something else, gently and lovingly bring it back and carry on.

Now, I am used to asking people to drop into their bodies, but another way of putting this is to say, connect to your body and become aware, and present.

You can do this simply by taking a few slow and gentle easy breaths, and becoming quiet.

And then knowing what it is You want from the process.

For example : I want my partner to feel my love for them. I want them to know that I am grateful to them for being in my life. And if you like, you can even bring in your spiritual side here. Like Your Highest self, or the True Self, and ask – Highest self or Truest Self, what is your intention for what I’m about to do or experience? And just sit with that for a moment. Usually the answer comes up very quickly. And it can sound like your own voice or you could get a picture or a video. It’s okay to trust yourself.

Then focus on that which was provided to You.

If you’re in a relationship, I recommend that You both do this before You engage in sexual activity.

For couples it would usually look like this :

You face each other, you can sit in Yab Yum, one partner sits on top of the other, you are belly to belly, face to face.

And you can relax together, Your partner can ask You “What is Your highest or truest selves intention for our love making session today?” and just be present on the answer. And You can return that favour, or You can silently do this as You are connected in the Yab Yum position. And be curious to explore what could come from this experience.

Then You might decide to gently kiss each other and feel what the energy does from there.

It is a deeply powerful experience to connect like this.

As You can see intention is so deeply powerful. Whenever I write anything, or whenever I do anything I remind myself to set an intention. To live moment to moment, and to set an intention.

When I communicate with this person, what is my intentions? Are they loving? Compassionate? Am I setting boundaries from a space of self love and love for this person?

You can do this while setting boundaries as well.

When I eat, what is the intention of the food? When I dance, what is the intention for the dance?

It brings You into the moment of now, of presence and being conscious. I have an intention for my day as well. When I wake up, I do my inner work, and I have set an intention or at least a few intentions for the day.

Even when I have a list of work to do, I will set the intention of what I will have achieved. It has totally changed the way I live life. In fact setting the intention has allowed me to be more productive too.

I would love to hear back from You on how you found setting intentions in your life.

I am challenging myself this week to up my own game and to be more present in setting intentions and consciously going through life from a space of Pleasure and peace.

Till next time!

Bye for now.

Yab – Yum Position for Couples :